210

my so called new chapter of life, ends with just 10 entries. Well, it is not fully 10 entries about this new chapter but it took 10 entries to wrap up the whole thing.

so, thats it..the shortest chapter in my book. "Edward Low - My Life"

have to pick up myself and charge to the finish line of this semester, I admit its the worse timing for this to happen because I got no time to act emo or depress. Even if I do, I have to hold it because assignments are lining up. Knocking at my door and say "oi!!! screw that emo thingy, get us done first will you??"

so, I have to challenge myself on this emotional control and pick myself up as soon as...right after that happen. No time for this, just like how Man United pick up themselves after 2 straight lost to Liverpool and Fulham. Now we are the league champion!!!

before I go to bed last night...I've been thinking...

FML

Today, I've been told that she is more comfortable with me as a friend and she is seeing someone else instead. She think it might work out between us, but feel weird recently and decided to kick me out of the game. Did I tell you that she told me I am the first on her list? Leave me no choice but to tell it out how I feel. She said she is ready, so all we need to do is wait until I go back to KL. But with 30 days left, she said lets just be friend. FML

The feeling is like you Usain Bolt sprinting to the finish line, leaving all the competitors far behind. Just about 1m away from reaching the finish line, organisers tell him he is more suitable in swimming. Tell him dont have to take part in sprinting anymore. 

The feeling of someone snatching something you are confident to get right in front of your nose.

Now all I will say is...for the past few weeks. What we have planned, all wipe off just like that.

GentinWHAT??

Hulu LanWHAT??

meatbaWHAT??

ChickenRiWHAT??

P.S. I LoWHAT??

TransforWHAT??

Well, just to name a few...but all the fun that I thought will be happening, they are not going to happen. 

and YES!!! Things wont be the same anymore...this is what you and I afraid of at the beginning. But you make it happen before even we really begin.

Unfair for me?? whatever...

Whats wrong with me?? Is it because I am not working yet?? Is it because I am in Singapore??Is it because I cant sms or call everytime?? Is it because I dont who are the American Idol's finalist?? (quite possible for all these reason)

Then I realise, being a funny guy like me. Who makes people laugh until cry with my creative thinking of lameness jokes. Is not enough to win a girl's heart, they will only feel comfortable when they are with you. But not being with you day in day out. It just like they when they need a man to talk with, they will come to you. When they want to laugh, they come to you. Thats it...

think back my entire 21 years of life, especially in the past few years as I grow older. I gain many female friends, everyone like my jokes, they enjoy the time being with me but all of them will draw a border line on the frienship zone. 

Should I change myself?? i dont think so...

its not the first time I expereince this, girl can change in split second. They can be very friendly, very close to you for many weeks and give you hope. Suddenly, without knowing the reason, they build a wall in between. sometimes, I dont even know what is the reason behind. 

here, Hollywood director..take my idea. Its a movie I think might do well like those romantic comedy drama movie. 

its a story about a guy who try to get near to girls with his sense of humor and all of them end up being his friends. Some even become close friends, but none as his girlfriend. He is still looking for the girl and ofcourse the ending will be he finally found the girl. 

Although not happening yet...

here I will say it for one last time, Korean drama sucks!!! Life dont turn out like what you seen in those shitty drama. It brain wash you!!!

but whatever it is, this 210th entry will end everything. I will not talk about it anymore from next entry onwards...

again..its not a personal attack or what. I just wanted to express my feelings...

ohya, the whole new play list is how I describe my feelings...just listen~

-the end-